When You're Sober
by JenKristo
Summary: Kenny is addicted to College parties, and only Cartman can save him. CartmanxKenny Slash.
1. Drunken Kenny Escapades

When You're Sober

It was dark as the two boys walked across campus. Cartman could see his breath in front of him as he walked, as well as the sway of his drunken friend in the corner of his eye.

"I swear to God," Cartman complained, "you better not black out again, because this time I'm not carrying your sorry ass back to the apartment. I'll leave you here in the snow, you hear me?"

Kenny snorted. "You.. ha. You love walking me back. You do it all the time."

"I love it? I love it as much as I love cleaning your puke off the bathroom floor. So what if I feel guilty to leave you at those frat parties to get screwed in your sleep. You're so goddamn irresponsible."

Cartman couldn't help glancing again at Kenny's attire. No longer was he the modestly-dressed eight year old. No, the years had slapped height on him with barely any extra weight, and so his poor, skinny ass continued to wear the old orange jacket trimmed with brown synthetic fur. It was now short enough that his midriff showed above chocolate, low-rise pants that clung to his curves like nothing Cartman could think of. His eye settled on the black stringed undergarment arching over his friend's hip. The corruption of college life ran hot and heavy through Kenny's blood.

"Like what you see?" Kenny snickered as he bumped elbows with Cartman.

"Shut the fuck up." Cartman murmured as he looked ahead of him.

"Let's take this shortcut," Kenny said, pointing into the woods on the side of the path.

"What the hell are you talking about?"

Kenny staggered off the sidewalk into the woods, Cartman reluctantly following behind. They walked through the pines, Cartman growing wary as the light from the street lamps weakened. They were surely getting no where.

Soon they entered a clearing lit only by the moon and Kenny stopped. He turned around and grinned stupidly at the other. "This is my secret place. Isn't it cool?"

Cartman frowned. "Where are we, Kenny?"

"I told you. This is my secret spot."

Cartman was unimpressed. Kenny's Drunken Escapades were always long and irritating. This was most definitely a secret place plenty of frat jocks had visited with Kenny. He began walking back the way he came when Kenny spoke.

"This place may be a secret, but I've got an even bigger one."

"What!" Cartman yelled as he turned around, only to be silenced by Kenny's mouth. Kenny pulled away but stayed close, his forehead pressing against Cartman's.

This was _not_ a normal part of the Drunken Kenny Escapades. His breath caught in his throat as the blonde pressed up against him. Never, not ever, had Kenny behaved this way. His mind whirling, Cartman took Kenny by the waist and kissed him back. Kenny wasted no time pulling Cartman to the ground.

"Fuck me," Kenny whispered, his blue eyes glazed with alcohol. Cartman hesitated; Kenny was really drunk. He finally gave in, kissing the blonde and pressing him to the snow. The kiss deepened and Kenny's hands trailed to Cartman's zipper. Cartman slipped his tongue between Kenny's lips and winced as the strong taste of alcohol hit him. Enough was enough.

Cartman pulled away and stood. "Let's go."

"Wuh-huh? But…"

"We'll do it at the apartment. It's too cold here."

Cartman grabbed Kenny's hand and pulled him to his feet. He was sure that by the time they reached the apartment, all of tonight would be forgotten.

Author's Note: Should I continue this? I have something in mind but I dunno if it's good enough. Let me know what you think.


	2. Breakfast of Champions

When You're Sober 2

When You're Sober 2

Kenny woke with the usual Saturday morning hangover. He grumbled as he sat up in bed, looking around his bedroom. It was nice to wake in his own bed once in a while. It was also a good feeling to wake up and not wonder if someone was with you. The 'no sleepovers' policy in the apartment was totally annoying at first but he had grown to appreciate it.

The smell of breakfast filled the air as Kenny walked downstairs. As expected, Kyle and Stan sat eating at the table, Cartman at the stove.

"Morning, sleeping beauty," Stan said.

Kenny rubbed his eyes and croaked out a greeting.

"Why the hell did you call the apartment last night?" Kyle complained, "Why didn't you call Cartman's cell?"

Kenny watched tiredly over Cartman's shoulder as he made omelets and hash browns. "He didn't answer. I needed to be walked home."

"Why? You're twenty! You can't walk yourself?"

"Leave him alone," Cartman said nonchalantly as he flipped an omelet.

"What are you, his mom?" Kyle said.

"I just don't feel like listening to your shit today, Jew. He woke you up. Big deal. At least he only does it on the weekend. Butters' dorm roommate wakes him up all the time." Cartman passed him a plate of steaming breakfast and Kenny sighed. He picked up a piece of hash brown and closed his eyes as he put it in his mouth. There was no better remedy for a hangover than Cartman's cooking.

At first they had taken turns cooking, but after so many bowls of Ramen and shitty instant pancakes it was unanimous that Cartman should be chef. They were all spoiled and Kenny was sure that Kyle's moodiness would be far more severe if not for Cartman's taming recipes.

"So," Kenny said to Cartman, "Any new adventures last night? I can't remember shit."

Cartman stayed quiet, not meeting Kenny's eyes. "Nothing new," he finally answered, "You were shit-faced as usual. At least you didn't throw up on me… this time."

"Mm.. That's good." Kenny pulled a fork out of the drawer and ate at the counter beside the stove. "You gonna eat, Cartman?"

"Nah. Maybe later."

Cartman gave Kenny a sideways glance. "You really don't remember anything?"

"Nuh huh. Why?"

Cartman shrugged.

"C'mon. What happened?"

"Nothing."

"Just tell me!"

"I said nothing!" Cartman yelled, "If you wanna know then maybe you shouldn't get so wasted!"

"Who are you to tell me anything?" Kenny yelled back.

"Who am I? I'm you're goddamn babysitter! You're pathetic!"

"Fucking fatass!"

"Whore."

Kenny couldn't speak. They stared at each other for a long time before Cartman stormed out. Kenny glanced at the table where Stan and Kyle looked down at their empty plates. He clenched his fork, embarrassment flooding him. His foolish behavior and bad choices suddenly felt so much heavier.

Tbc…

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	3. Kenny' New Job

When You're Sober 3

The week went by slowly without either boy attempting to reconcile. They avoided speaking at all costs, and Kenny found himself spending a lot more time walking around campus. Wednesday finally came and Kenny stepped through the doors of the art department for the first day of his new job.

There really wasn't a more suiting job than nude modeling for Kenny. Even so, he felt a slight nervousness as he took his clothes off in the dressing room in the art class. Barely anyone had been in the room when he had come in but he was sure there must be at least twenty five by now. He had never been naked in front of _that _many people before. He stepped out in a robe and the professor greeted him.

"Forgive the students if they draw you rather femininely," the professor said in a mild manner. "You're the first male model we've had this year. Surprisingly it's the boys who are shyer."

Kenny smiled and nodded but something caught his attention out of the corner of his eye.

Cartman stood at his easel, gaping. He felt his face get hot at the sight of his roommate. He walked over to him and Cartman frowned.

"Since when did you go to art classes?" Kenny asked sourly.

"Since I changed my minor. Since when have you been a fucking model?"

"I saw a flyer on the bulletin. I assume you don't object to me being able to pay my rent for once?"

Despite the small talk, Kenny was getting nervous. The professor was calling attention for the class to settle at their easels which were positioned around the edge of the room. He turned to Kenny and handed him a bottle of Coke.

"Take a swig if you're nervous," said the professor out of reach of the students' ears. Kenny was glad that Professor Rosen was nice. Kenny took a swig and passed it back to him, finally disrobing. It would have been a lot easier, Kenny thought, if the Coke had rum in it.

He posed first away from Cartman, following the instructions Professor Rosen had given him at the interview. He was to rotate a few degrees and change the position of his arms a bit every three minutes so each drawing was a different view. The room was warm and the quiet was disturbed only by the rustling of charcoal on paper. He was finally forced to face Cartman. He glanced at Cartman whose arm was working at the paper forcefully, his gaze focused somewhere around Kenny's feet. His eye traveled up and stopped at his chest but he never made eye contact.

A few more poses passed and the Professor told him he could put the robe back on. "We're taking a ten minute break, class. I want you to take out some good paper and your pastels. We're doing a thirty-minute pose next."

Kenny felt pretty bored; he wasn't used to classes that didn't have someone lecturing the whole time. He wished there was a radio or something. He went to a desk in the corner of the room where he sat, taking up the Coke and pretending it was vodka. Cartman left the room with most of the class, not meeting Kenny's eye as he went. The Professor smiled at him and walked over. "You're moving a lot during the poses," he said.

"Am I really?" Kenny hadn't noticed, but he assumed that artists were more aware of that kind of stuff.

"You'll have to keep extra still for the half-hour pose, or the students will have trouble."

"Ok, I will."

Ten minutes went by slowly and they finally returned to how they were before. The professor set a tall stool in the center of the room and draped a white sheet over it. Kenny glanced at Cartman who was frowning at him. His confidence started to rise and he began to get a little annoyed. Why was Cartman so mad when it was _Kenny_ that got called a whore? Kenny disrobed and sat with his side to Cartman, turning his head to look him in the eye. He was determined to stare him down for the whole thirty minutes.

To his relief, the professor granted one of the students permission to turn on the radio, and he listened as she tuned in to the one of the only decent 'today's hits' stations on South Park University.

Gavin DeGraw's new song, "Love with a Girl" began to play. It wasn't his favorite song but it was better than nothing. The sound of his voice felt better to Kenny as he watched Cartman work. Curiosity struck him at what was on the other side of the easel. He snorted out loud as he thought of Titanic, and for the first time Cartman met him in the eye.

"Everything all right?" the professor asked.

"Uh huh," Kenny said, not unlocking his gaze with Cartman. Cartman suddenly became aware that he had stopped drawing and went back to work. Cartman hadn't blushed at all but seeing him a bit flustered was still satisfying. Oasis' "Wonderwall" began to play from the radio and Kenny relaxed even more.

Thirty minutes passed quickly from there and by the end of class Kenny could barely keep his eyes open. Cartman closed up his papers and left without talking to Kenny, and finally the room was empty save himself and the professor.

"Listen," Professor Rosen said as Kenny put the robe on. "You're really moving during the poses. I have a lot of other students who want to model. I'm sorry to say that you're just not up to par."

"I can sit still. I'll do better next time." Kenny rubbed his eyes.

The professor looked at him sympathetically then smiled. "How about this… You pose for ten full minutes without moving and I'll let you try again next week."

Kenny nodded and sat on the stool.

"Why don't you disrobe? I'll draw you while we pass the time."

Kenny took off the robe a little clumsily and dropped it aside. Professor Rosen began to draw. Unlike before, the professor talked a lot. He talked about all the models over the ages, how famous painters such as Goya would paint the same woman over and over, how very subtly one could find her face on angels and in crowds in the background. Only a few minutes passed and he stopped drawing, continuing to talk as he slowly paced around Kenny.

"You're doing it again."

Kenny felt a hand on his back and one on his shoulder as the professor straightened him up. "You're posture sinks as you sit." He didn't remove his hands after that, but Kenny couldn't really register. He was so tired he could barely stay up. He felt the professor's hand slide over his chest before he blacked out.

Tbc…

Please review! I want to know what you think.


	4. Cartman has a Dream

When You're Sober 4

When You're Sober 4

Kenny woke feeling sick in a different way than a hangover. His head pounded and his stomach ached. He shifted slightly and opened his eyes. The lights were bright but he couldn't see more than blurs.

"C-Cartman…" Kenny murmured as he sat up.

"Kenny!" said a familiar voice. Kenny's vision began to clear and he looked around at the hospital room. The voice was from Kyle who was clinging to his sleeve. "Kenny, I'm so sorry I was mean to you, thank god you're alive." Kyle pulled him into a hug and Kenny looked behind him at Stan.

"You ok, Kenn?" Stan asked as Kyle let go. "We called your house but we kept getting a busy signal. I think it's off the hook."

"What's going on?" Kenny grumbled.

Kyle and Stan looked at each other and back at Kenny. "The art professor slipped you a date rape drug."

His memory flooded back to him all at once and he gasped. "Holy shit. I remember… I remember he gave me a coke. I thought he was so nice and then I got like, super exhausted. Where is he?"

"He's in fucking prison now," Stan said.

Kyle smiled. "You look better than we anticipated."

Kenny couldn't help noticing his two roommates interlocking hands and how tight Kyle was holding on. 'They're together?' he thought. He felt a little bad for not noticing something that must have been right in front of his face.

"You guys, I'm really sorry I cause trouble. I'm sorry I call late and wake you up and I'm sorry I miss the rent so often. I'm going to be a better friend-"

"Shut up, Dude." Stan said with a smile. "We've been together forever. A little college fever isn't going to change anything."

Kenny nodded and they stayed silent. He shifted a little and frowned. "I'm not sore where I should be if you know what I mean."

"Yeah, Cartman caught him before he got to you." Kyle said, "Caught him with his fucking pants down. Cartman beat the crap outta-"

"Cartman! Where is he?"

"He was making us nervous with his pacing so we sent him to get your clothes. We told him you'd appreciate having them when you woke up. We sent him a while ago so he should be back soon."

Kenny looked out the window at the blue sky. "I couldn't have been out very long, it's still bright outside."

"Kenny, you've been out for two days. Today is Friday."

"Two days? Jesus. So why are you guys here if it's been two days?"

"Well, you happened to wake during our visit," Kyle said. "We probably woke you up."

Kenny looked away. "How's Cartman behaving? Is he mad at me?"

"I'm not sure why he would be mad at you," Kyle said, "but no. He's been here more than we have. He stayed with you whenever the nurses would let him. You know they had to yell at him to get him to leave the first night. I think he really cares-"

Stan put a hand on Kyle's shoulder and he stopped.

Kenny sighed just as Cartman stepped into the room. "Kenny, you're awake!" he said, dropping the bag of clothes and walking over. He stared down at Kenny, looking him over.

"Well, ah, we're going to go." Stan said as he headed for the door.

"I'm glad you're ok, Kenny," Kyle said before leaving. The door shut behind them and Cartman collapsed into the chair beside Kenny's bed. He leaned forward with his face in his hands.

"I'm uh.. I'm fine, really." Kenny said. It was the truth. It had only taken a few minutes for his headache to dissolve. "See? Look at me."

Cartman raised his head but kept his eyes away from Kenny. He ran his fingers through his hair.

"Eric Cartman, look me in the fucking eye! I'm fine!"

Cartman finally looked at him, assured by the menacing tone. Kenny's heart sank at Cartman's worried expression. "It must have sucked," Kenny said, "walking into that situation. I thought you had left the art building."

"I was waiting outside to yell at you about something but I got impatient and went to find you. I was so stunned when I saw the professor taking his pants off and you laying there... the thing is, if you were drunk, I could see you pulling a stunt like that. It wouldn't be the first time you've done a teacher. I was so close to walking away and minding my own business, but I know you when you're sober and I remembered you hadn't been drinking. You're a different person when your head's clear. You're smart and… I looked again and realized you were unconscious."

"That's when you beat the shit out of Rosen, right?" Kenny grinned and Cartman frowned disapprovingly.

"I'm glad he didn't charge me for assault." The corner of Cartman's mouth curled into a smile. "But it was worth the risk."

Kenny smiled. "I'm damn glad you decided to come get me."

There was a silence.

"In the kitchen the other day…" Cartman said suddenly, "I didn't mean to call you that."

"You don't have to apologize. We both know it's true."

"Don't say that. If you say it then it's official. If someone else says it then it's just an opinion, but it's not my opinion. I shouldn't have said it because... it's not what I think of you."

Kenny studied Cartman. "Cartman, when we were kids you were a total racist asshole. You were a gullible, crazy egoist and it seemed like you didn't give a shit how people felt."

Cartman had the strangest look on his face and Kenny laughed. "And I add that it's all gone except for two things."

"Those being?"

"You're still an asshole sometimes…"

"Yeah, and?"

"You still don't care how people feel, at least, how they feel about you. It's like you're indifferent rather than arrogant. I've noticed how you don't compare yourself to people anymore. You stopped telling everyone about your amazing grades, you don't talk about anything you do at all. Cartman, what do you do?"

Cartman looked a bit taken aback. "Uh… I don't know what I do."

"See? You don't think about yourself! C'mon. Tell me what you like to do."

"I… well, I hate classes, and most people besides you and the Style bore me to tears. I could talk to you three forever, but besides that… I guess… I cook." Cartman looked away, lost in thought. "I'm thinking about dropping business completely and focusing on culinary arts. You _know_ my food is fucking amazing. I'd like to start my own place. I have this ideal life in my head where the four of us continue to grow up in the same town. I can imagine us twenty years from now, hanging out at my restaurant every Friday, laughing about whatever crazy shit is happening in our lives."

Kenny leaned forward in the bed, enjoying the fantasy. "That sounds really amazing."

Cartman's smile faded as he came back to reality. "So yeah, I like to cook. That and…"

"That and what?"

Cartman stood up. "Kenny, I got something to tell you. It's about the night before our fight during breakfast. I didn't tell you what happened…"

"Don't worry about it."

"No, it's wrong not to tell you. I have to-"

"Really, you don't have to tell me."

"But-"

"Cartman, I already know!"

Cartman's eyes widened. "What?"

Kenny guiltily looked up at Cartman. "I lied when I asked you what happened. I remember everything."

Tbc…

Review free or die hard.


	5. Confessions and Flashbacks

When You're Sober 5

"I lied when I asked you what happened," Kenny said "I remember everything."

Cartman's mind began to spin, random thoughts popping in and out of his mind. He remembered the first time he saw Kenny take off his hood. Kyle and Stan hadn't been at the bus stop that day and it was just the two of them, awkward little fourth graders in their awkward little silence.

'_So why do you wear a hood all the time?'_

'_I dunno.'_ Kenny said through the fabric. _'Why?'_

'_No reason,'_ Cartman said, sounding snot-nosed as he always had back then. _'It's just weird not knowing what you look like when I see you every day. What if I saw you running down the street one day, being chased by loan sharks? What if they had already taken your coat? I wouldn't recognize you without it!'_

Kenny looked over at Cartman with those pretty blues. '_You just wanna see me, don't you?'_

Cartman didn't know what to say as Kenny took off his hood. He was the prettiest thing Cartman had ever seen, standing there smiling with those lips, staring with those eyes, his cheeks and nose pink from the cold. Most shocking of all was his hair; Cartman's mind thought it was as pretty as melting butter and as soft looking as daisies.

Cartman remembered the first time he saw Kenny drunk. He had called Cartman at two in the morning asking to be walked home, the beginning of a sick cycle filled with things Kenny regretted saying and things Cartman wanted to forget he ever heard.

Still, there was always the beautiful morning after when Kenny would come downstairs with a hangover and eat whatever Cartman made him. He thought some of their best talks had been over Saturday morning breakfast.

Cartman remembered the one time he had entered a frat house. Kenny had called but never came outside when Cartman arrived. Cartman waited, and called with no answer. He remembered the smell of cigarettes and pot as he came in the door, past the crowd of people and instinctively up the stairs to the bedrooms. He remembered finding Kenny passed out on a bed, two guys gluing feathers into his hair; Kenny's marvelous, perfect hair.

Cartman remembered the morning after, the first time he had ever touched Kenny's hair. He remembered Kenny's whining as he pulled the feathers out, painstakingly picking at the glue. He had never been angrier when he looked down at the mess. It must have hurt terribly, and Kenny's beautiful hair wasn't the same for weeks.

He remembered the fight he and Kenny had a few months ago. Kenny had come out for breakfast in a frat shirt and his underwear.

'_Why the hell do you dress like that here?_' Cartman had yelled, _'I get that you want to look good for your boys, but what's the point around here? Dress like a fucking normal person if you're not trying to impress anyone.'_

Kenny had worn the same attire every morning for a week after their fight. Kenny could be so spiteful.

Cartman remembered having his first time with Kyle. High school prom was the first and last time Cartman would ever be drunk, and the first time he would ever have sex with Kyle. It had ended quickly and they lay there in Kyle's bed, both thinking about somebody else.

Cartman stood in the hospital room, looking down at Kenny.

"You… You what?"

"I lied. I'm sorry. I was so embarrassed of what I did. I didn't want to have to talk about it, ever. You see Cartman, that's not how I feel about you."

Cartman's heart sank. He couldn't collapse into the chair again, dramatically covering his face. He couldn't pace around the room or swear or even blink. He just stood there listening.

"I…" Kenny's face broke into a blush and he gripped the blanket on his lap. "I don't want you to get the impression that I… that I wanted you to be another fuck on my list. When I drink, all I think about is you and that's why I drink all the time! I think about you when I'm _with them_. Walking home with you every night lets me pretend like it was you in the bedroom." Kenny's eyes gushed with tears like Cartman had never seen, and even more shocking were the words coming out of Kenny's mouth. "You… You remember that time we fought about what I wore to breakfast?"

"You wore the same thing for a week afterwards to spite me," Cartman said, though his mind was still stuck on Kenny's previous confessions.

"You told me to wear stuff like that when I was trying to im-impress someone. I wasn't trying to spite you. I was p-proving a point."

Cartman gaped. "You wanted to impress _me_."

Kenny wiped his face on the blanket, nodding his head.

"Jesus Christ." Cartman said. "You've never... Why haven't you said anything to me?"

Kenny looked away, shrugging.

"Christ," Cartman repeated, "I've had everything backwards." Cartman sat on the edge of the bed, staring into space. "You know Kyle and I were together for a while."

Kenny paused. "You were?"

"Yeah. Kyle broke up with me pretty randomly one day. He said, _'You're really nice to me when we're alone, but every time Kenny walks in the room it's like I'm not even there.'_ Remember the fight I had with Stan after graduation?"

"Who could forget that? He pushed you down the stairs and you threw him through a screened door."

"Uh huh. Well, we were fighting about Kyle. Kyle and I had just broken up and that's when Stan found out about us. I had no idea Stan felt that way about Kyle until we had that fight. It made me realize why we had been together in the first place. See, we had something in common: We both felt like we didn't deserve who we really wanted."

"Cartman…"

"Yeah?"

"Get me the fuck outta this hospital."

Tbc…

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	6. The Pot Pie End

When You're Sober 6

"Alright," said the nurse as she filled out the release forms. "Make sure you call us if you start getting dizzy or feeling any of the symptoms I mentioned before."

Kenny nodded as she passed him the forms.

"And you have a ride home?" the Nurse asked.

Cartman raised his hand and she left.

"I hate hospitals," Cartman said as he drove to South Park University. The snow was thick in the air and the roads were coated with slush.

"Why do youhate it so much?" Kenny asked, "_I'm_ the one who's jinxed."

Cartman smirked. "That's the reason. I hate seeing you there. You're a fucking accident waiting to happen."

Kenny snorted and they continued to drive on the long stretch of empty road.

"So…" Cartman said.

"So?"

"It's Friday. You're not going to…"

"Shit, dude! You think I'm going partying?"

Cartman glanced Kenny's way. "You haven't missed a Friday drink since first semester, and I know you've gone to parties after other hospital visits. Remember that time you got hit by the nude chick on a motorcycle? You made me drop you off at the Frat house with bandages on your face."

"Jesus, I remember that. I was a real cock-walrus, wasn't I?"

Cartman smiled, staring through the worsening snow storm. "You're still a cock-walrus." Cartman continued before Kenny could protest. "So what are you going to do if you're not partying?"

"Well, I could always visit Butters," Kenny said, teasingly.

"I don't think so!" Cartman yelled. "You're fucking hanging out with me."

Kenny grinned. "So what are we going to do?"

"I don't know," Cartman said, his voice lowering a bit, "What do you want to do?"

"I want you to teach me how to make pot pie."

"Seriously?"

"Yes! You make a mean pot pie and I want in on the secret."

"Pot-fucking-pie it is, then."

They drove on through the snow in a comfortable silence. Every once in a while Kenny would glance Cartman's way and he couldn't help letting his imagination wander. Cartman wasn't exactly one to make things official, but his hospital confession was enough for Kenny to say they were together. Kenny closed his eyes, enjoying the way 'together' sounded in his mind.

Kenny looked back at Cartman, thinking of all the possibilities in their future. He felt like a girl imagining them sitting closer together on the couch or cooking breakfast on a Saturday morning and even holding hands. He imagined them having wild fights and even wilder sex.

Kenny shivered at the thought that making love with Cartman was a plausible part of his future. Cartman's manners ranged so greatly from dominant and angry to cautious and gentle, he could only imagine that he was similar sexually. Kenny looked at the steering wheel and at the huge hands he loved so much.

0o0o0o0

Cartman glanced away from the road to the blonde staring at him. "What's your malfunction?" he asked.

Kenny snapped back to reality. "Oh, I was just… did you get your hair cut?"

"You're a freak, Kenny."

"Can I…" Kenny began as he unbuckled his seat belt.

"Hmm?"

Kenny scooted closer to him until he could whisper into Cartman's ear. "Can I maybe… every once in a while… call you Eric?"

Cartman felt butterflies in his stomach at the sound of Kenny saying his name. Even more distracting was the orange-hooded boy pressing up against him. His heart raced as the blonde got closer, his thin fingers traveling up Cartman's arm to his shoulder. He felt Kenny's mouth on his ear, his tongue sliding across the rim followed by a soft bite.

There was a loud roar outside as the car drifted over the rumble strips. "Watch out!" Kenny yelled as Cartman jerked the car back onto the road. Kenny smirked. "Am I distracting you?" Kenny moved back to Cartman's ear and blew on it. In a swift move Cartman grabbed Kenny by the hair. "Cut that shit out or you'll kill both of us."

Both boys were knocked to the side as the car suddenly swerved, fishtailing on a patch of ice. They screamed as the car spun off the road, finally stopping on the grass.

"Fuck," Cartman said, looking at the one in his arms. "Kenny, you ok?"

There was no mistaking the look in Kenny's eyes when Cartman met his stare, no mistaking what he wanted. Cartman obliged the silent request, leaning over and kissing him. He couldn't believe he was actually kissing Kenny, the boy he had known for nearly twenty years, the one person he had loved his entire life. They fumbled around and Cartman grabbed Kenny's leg, pulling him onto his lap.

"Your… your hands…on me," Kenny pleaded in almost a whisper. Kenny gripped at Cartman's chocolate hair as he slid his hands over Kenny's bare hips and beneath the orange coat. Kenny's breathing was shaky as the other explored him, teasing him until he whimpered. Cartman pressed his mouth to Kenny's soft lips, the taste of anything he could ever want playing on his tongue.

"Holy shit," Cartman breathed, "I _love_ when you're sober." Kenny smiled and they kissed again. Pot pie would have to wait.

END

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